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Sheamus vs Mark Henry

Justin announces Sheamus with his Royal Rumble Match win and how he’s facing D-Bry at WrestleMania. Henry out looking cranky, as usual.

They lock up, Sheamus backed into a corner, Henry pulled back. Blows on Sheamus, but he gets free. Blows to Sheamus, then into a clothesline. Henry shakes his head, pissed. Chop block, then high knee to Henry. Sheamus whipped, but gets his feet up. Sheamus up and hits a flying shoulder for two. Forearms to Henry through the ropes, but Henry fights back. Big blow to Sheamus’ upper back.

Sheamus whipped, then clotheslined in the corner. Shoulder blocks to Sheamus in the corner. Sheamus ducks a blow and on Henry in the corner. Back and forth, then Sheamus really on Henry with blows. Fans cheer for Sheamus as the ref checks Henry. Brogue kick is missed, then Henry sets up for the world’s strongest slam, but Sheamus gets free and hits his brogue kick for three.

Winner – Sheamus

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Otunga in the ring in his goofy outfit and bow tie. As a graduate of Harvard Law School, he’s never had a boss that was so creative, considerate, insightful, or as intelligent as Mr. John Laurinaitis. He can only pray that the Board of Directors does the right thing and keeps John Laurinaitis, Executive Vice President of Talent Relations and Interim RAW General Manager. Please, pray with him now… Otunga Tebows in the center of the ring. Justin announces that per the COO, Otunga has a match, right now. Otunga isn’t impressed and isn’t dressed for it. Sheamus out with a huge grin on his face!

Otunga vs Sheamus

Sheamus stalks Otunga, then grabs Otunga’s kick in the air. Sheamus grabs Otunga, but he wiggles out of his sweater and free of the ring. Sheamus rolls it up and throws it from the ring. Sheamus ducks a clothesline, then double axe handle clotheslines Otunga. Sheamus through the rope forearms, then a short clothesline. Sheamus picks up Otunga who holds onto the ropes. DDT on Sheamus for one. Otunga stomps Sheamus in a corner, then right back on Sheamus with blows and stomps as the ref yells at Otunga to get off. Otunga removes his shirt to show his physique, but then a big boot for three from Sheamus as Cole yells that it wasn’t fair.

Winner – Sheamus

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Mr. John Laurinaitis to the ring, shaking hands with fans on his way there. King and Cole talk about Royal Rumble being historic and hopefully it will be for Laurinaitis tonight. Cole wants Laurinaitis to stay, King, not so much. Laurinaitis continued shaking hands around the ring as King and Cole talked on about Sheamus winning the Royal Rumble Match. Laurinaitis on mic and says he’s looking forward to his performance review, unlike them. Has be made mistakes, yes, but what man hasn’t. It’s okay to make mistakes, as long as you don’t make them twice. After tonight he’ll be the permanent GM. Besides the review is by a great man, Trip, and they’re good friends. Then there’s his performance last night at the Royal Rumble when he was Special Guest Ref, did what he said, called it right down the middle, and did his job backstage. Now we’re on on the road to WrestleMania, with a stop at Elimination Chamber. Punk will defend his Title against five others in an Elimination Chamber Match.

The people in the match will be CM Punk, Kofi Kingston, Dolph Ziggler, Miz, R-Truth, and Jericho. We’ll all enjoy watching it, but let’s talk tonight. It’s special as Beth will defend her Divas Championship against Eve. Kofi will face Miz. Dolph will face Orton. A momentus match, first time ever, D-Bry will take on Punk. Think that’s all he has coming…

Punk’s music cuts Laurinaitis off, but Laurinaitis keeps that plastic smile on his face! On stage Punk starts stinging Laurinaitis out of the area – sorta. The fans grab right on and keep singing and Punk continues. Has King sing into the mic, then Justin does it, Punk keeps singing – badly. A sign could be seen that said, “Bring back the Anonymous RAW GM!” Punk into the ring and Laurinaitis still with the plastic smile. Again Punk starts the stinging. Right into Laurinaitis’ face and Punk says, “Goodbye clown shoes!” Laurinaitis laughs.

Laurinaitis tells Punk that Punk owes him an apology as Punk thought Laurinaitis was going to screw Punk out of his Title, but he didn’t. Laurinaitis says he’s a man of his word. Punk says he doesn’t owe Laurinaitis anything, least of all an apology. Laurinaitis is a liar, not a man of his word! Unless being a man of his word mean poorly dressed patsy? That’s a good word. Ham sandwich dork? Dork fits. He came out for one reason and one reason only, to see Laurinaitis’ dimwitted face one more time before he gets 86′d by Triple H.
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Sheamus vs Miz

Sheamus out to the ring to solid pop. Miz out to face him, carefully looking around for R-Truth.

Miz with a DDT on Sheamus before the bell. Miz ties Sheamus into the ropes, then on him with blows. First only hi left, then Miz tries to lock the right, but Sheamus is free and on Miz through the ropes with forearms. Sheamus on Miz hard and won’t stop. Miz over the barrier and to the fans looking very orange.

R-Truth on mic, but where? He says he’s in the crowd. Guess who he ran into? Little Jimmy! Miz in a black hoodie. Little Jimmy says he don’t like Miz! Ut oh! Little Jimmy says Miz is gonna get got. Miz over the barrier into a brogue kick. Sheamus backs off as R-Truth over the barrier. R-Truth gets a bottle of water from announce and hits Miz with it.

R-Truth back over the barrier talking to himself. Into the crowd and says this Miz weekly beat down was brought to you by Little Jimmy! R-Truth then asks a Beiber looking boy what he, Little Jimmy,has to say to that? After a pause he wishes Miz a happy new year!

Winner – ? Not Miz!

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Sheamus vs Jinder

Sheamus out to the ring with tons of pop and lots of ladies screaming for him. Video of Sheamus facing Jinder last week on SD. Jinder out talking smack in a mixture of his home language and English. Jinder will put Sheamus in his place. Cole likes the way Jinder dresses. King says Cole would look good in a turban, as King laughed. Cole says he’d like to ride in on an elephant!

Arms around Sheamus’ waist, but then Jinder on Sheamus with blows. One blow drops Jinder. Sheamus telegraphs and is kicked for it. Kick to Sheamus’ leg, then drop kick to the side of Sheamus’ head. High knee to Sheamus for one. Arm and chin hold on Sheamus into a chinlock. Double hand clotheslines from Sheamus. A clothesline in a corner, then a short clothesline in the center of the ring. Sheamus climbs, but Jinder ducks and Sheamus lands on his feet. Irish curse backbreaker, then Sheamus sets up for the Celtic cross and he hits it hard!

Winner – Sheamus

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Sheamus vs Jinder Mahal

Sheamus out to the ring all smiles. Jinder out ranting in his native tongue. He says the Great White will play a supporting role in Jinder’s Slammy winning performance. Jinder in and eats a brogue kick and it was over. No bells were rung and it was all over.

Winner – N/A

Sheamus leaves the ring and poses on the stage as the ref tends to Jinder.

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Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus

Ziggler out with Vickie, who’s still in that horrible outfit. Out comes Sheamus, all smiles. Off comes the shirt and we have a bell.

Ziggler with some quick dodging and taunts Sheamus. They tie up and down goes Ziggler. A struggle and now a headlock. Sheamus to the ropes and a big shoulder block. Tries again but Ziggler with a leapfrog and perfectly placed dropkick for two. In the corner and Ziggler goes flying. Irish whip and Ziggler is tied in the ropes for those forearms. Big snap suplex for two. Back and forth and a quick Ziggler neckbreaker for two. Stomp and choke by the ropes then another rest hold. Sheamus is up and rolls Ziggler down. Up for the powerslam, Ziggler slips out and a Rocker Dropper for two. Sheamus is reeling here. Ziggler with a modified Cobra clutch but Sheamus lifts him and tosses him down. Three Polish hammers and now headbutts in the corner. He drags Ziggler out for a short-arm clothesline. There’s the roar. High Cross attempt fails and Sheamus shoulder-first into the post. Ryder’s music hits he distracts Ziggler with a fake charge into the ring. Brogue kick and it’s over.

Winner: Sheamus

Replay of the match highlights and the distraction. Sheamus celebrates on the ramp then Ryder slides in and hits the Ruff Ryder, posing with the US title as Vickie screeches. Ryder’s music plays as he backs up the ramp celebrating. Vickie still screeching, Ryder down.

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Sheamus vs Jack Swagger w/ Vickie

Cole talks about social media as Sheamus heads to the ring. Cole and Booker talk about Sheamus’ temper. A pissed Swagger head for the ring, Vickie in tow.

They lock up. Sheamus taken down. Blows to the back of Sheamus’ neck. Both up, Swagger put in a corner. A big blow on Swagger, then more and they appear to be working stiff. Swagger slides from the ring and demands the ref contain Sheamus. Scoop slam to Sheamus, then Swagger leg drop missed as Sheamus moves. Swagger slammed, then a running knee to Swagger’s face for two. Sheamus gets Swagger in a corner, then backed off. Sheamus eats and elbow, then slammed to the mat. Swagger uses the corner to splash Sheamus on the mat as Vickie screeches outside. Arm hold on Sheamus. Knees to Sheamus’ gut, then forearms to his back. Swagger wrenches Sheamus’ arms back. Sheamus to his feet but Swagger takes him right back down. Sheamus back to his feet and slams his head back to get free. Ax handles to Swagger’s chest, then blows in a corner. Slams Swagger to the mat for two.

Sheamus climbs, Swagger knocks the ropes, Sheamus lands on his feet, then Swagger ducks the Brogue kick. Swagger grabs Sheamus’ ankle and locks it on, but Sheamus kicks out. Brogue kick to Swagger and it’s over.

Winner: Sheamus

Sheamus celebrates and looks down at Swagger who rolls out of the ring in the direction of Vickie.

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Sheamus vs Jack Swagger w/ Vickie

Sheamus out to the ring with a huge smile on his face. Sheamus gave an award to Beiber. Swagger out with his pushups and Vickie by his side.

They lock up and muscle around. Side headlock takeover on Swagger. Shoulder block to Swagger. Body lock take down on Sheamus. Clotheslines to Swagger, then knee drops in the ropes as Vickie screeches. Swagger clotheslined from the ring.

Forearms to Swagger through the ropes. Snap suplex on Swagger for two. Swagger ducks a clothesline and dives to take out Sheamus’ leg. Shoulder block drops Sheamus for two as Vickie screams. Cena Sr. is trending worldwide on Twitter. Blows to Swagger, but Swagger back with a belly-to-belly for two.

Arm/neck hold on Sheamus on the mat. Sheamus to the ropes, then an arm to the back. Again into the ropes and to the back. Shoulder block drops Swagger and both take a moment. To their feet and Sheamus with clotheslines, then blows in a corner. Clothesline in a corner, then Swagger slammed hard to the mat for two and Vickie is all thrilled that Swagger kicked out. Sheamus sets up for the Celtic cross, but Swagger free and a blow to Sheamus’ back. Swagger splashes Sheamus, then the ankle lock. Sheamus won’t tap, rolls over and kicks Swagger away and from the ring. Irish curse backbreaker to Swagger. Brogue kick to Swagger for three.

Winner: Sheamus

Vickie screeches from outside the ring. Sheamus poses for the fans and all smiles.

Wade Barrett vs Randy Orton

Wade out to the ring, leading his entire SS Team! Video of Wade defeating Orton last week with a thumb to Orton’s eye. Wade says last Friday he proved Orton is the past, Wade is the present and future. In consecutive weeks the Barrett barrage defeated Orton and Sheamus. Again he will devenomize the Viper. Orton leads his team down to the ring. Orton into the ring and stares out onto Wade and his team. Orton then poses.

Upper cuts to Wade. Orton into a corner and out with clothesline. Suplex on Wade, then a knee drop for two. Orton stomps Wade’s hand. Wade grabs Orton into a beautiful side slam for two. Blows to Orton’s head, then Orton is whipped and sells it. Wade stomps Orton in the corner as the heels watch closely. Orton out and fighting back, but Wade on him with blows, then a chinlock to the mat. Orton to his feet, but Wade wrenches on his hold to bring Orton back to the mat. Orton suplexes out of the hold.

Clotheslines to Wade, then that sick scoop slam! Orton pulls Wade up and to the apron. Orton hits his through the ropes DDT. Orton stalks Wade, but Cody rushes the ring and attacks Orton from behind. Of course this causes a DQ.

Winner: Orton via DQ

The faces clear most of the ring. Dolph sent to the apron, then a brogue kick from Sheamus and that leaves Hunico the lone heel in the ring. RKO to Hunico, then Ryan picks Hunico up high over his head and tosses him out onto his team.

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Air Boom vs Cody & Wade

Cody and Evan lock up. Arm hold on Evan, then a knee to his gut. Evan back on Cody with a knee to his gut. Kofi tags in. Cody runs the ropes and Kofi over the top for two. Blows back and forth. Kofi whipped but feeds Cody a foot. Wade knocked from the apron, then Cody takes Kofi down for two. Cody tags in Wade who pulls Kofi up and hits a swinging side slam for two. A seated abdominal stretch on Kofi. Kofi up and elbows out, but then takes blows, the last drops him to the mat for two.

Cody tags in and backs Kofi into a corner before stomping him. Kofi to the mat. Cody swings Kofi to the mat then locks on and arm and chin hold. Kofi free, but drop toe hold keeps him from tagging out. Wade tags in and punches on Kofi in the heel corner. Cody attacks from behind. “Cody sucks!” chants from the front row. Kofi tries to get to Evan, but Cody stops him. Blows on Kofi, but then hits a monkey flip on Cody! Both men are down, but able to tag out.

Evan on Wade with kicks, then Wade gets him up for the finisher, but Evan counters to a DDT for two that Cody breaks up. Evan up top, Cody distracts and Wade grabs Evan. Wasteland for three.

Winners: Wade & Cody

Christian runs to the ring and attacks Kofi. Cody and Wade join in, but then Sheamus’ music hits. A brogue kick to Cody as Wade and Christian flee. Sheamus over to help Kofi and orange Evan to his feet.

Sheamus came face-to-face with Beaker

Ever notice how much Sheamus looks like Beaker from The Muppets? It turns out it’s not just a passing resemblance. When The Celtic Warrior stopped Christian from bothering Beaker and Bunsen as they prepped their latest science experiment, he gave his puppet doppelganger a knowing nod before adding, “I’m afraid I can’t make it to the family reunion this year.”

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